What am I even doing anymore. For years here I’ve been, content with my loneliness and being nothing but a hypocrite and not knowing how to make myself better and trying to do what I can so people can give me a fucking chance and I feel as though I am wasting away my life and coping with the fact that nobody will ever like me the way I like them and that I won’t ever be anything but the girl who’s good at drawing and has a funny face and I can’t help but feel that everyone is feeling better about themselves in looking down on me and my pathetic self.
And then I remember I have to return to reality. And I just have to suck it up, and put my feelings elsewhere. 

I wish I wasn’t so ashamed of myself. 
I wish I could just talk to somebody. 
this would be the part where i scribble all over everything but this isn’t paper so just imagine i did